Burnt out...

Burnt out… thats one way to describe how I feel right now. It has been a turbulent two weeks, but it has also been brilliant. The stepping stones to a new life have been laid and here I am with a mountain to go burning the candle at all ends. 

It’s not all bad I am finally sinking my teeth into something I genuinely want to do, am working on projects that I will be able to share incredibly soon and its all so exciting and new. With work on the horizon  as well this new life does not seem to be slowing down anytime soon and that its just a crazy good feeling of accomplishment. 

But with all this new work added into my already hectic schedule of work and college I am more tired than ever before. Days are longer, with less down time. But its only a matter of time before all this hard work pays off… 

A Moment...

It’s late, I can’t remember the last time I had a full nights sleep or a day where my head wasn’t preoccupied with a hundred other things. 

But all I what to do is take a snapshot of this moment, to never forget what it feels like right now. After a week of emailing we met with a client, a chance encounter has let to what will hopefully be a substantial project and a quick fire email yesterday led to filming an Art Gallery Opening tonight. As well as a few more projects in the wings. Life is busy and I am struggling to believe my luck. 

So here’s a tip, no matter how hectic everything seems, take a second to just soak in the moment cause just like that its over. Opportunities are rare and you have to take chances when you can. Say yes to as many things as you can. If its what you want, go for it! The worst you can do is fail, and a little failure along the way makes it all the more special when you achieve your dreams. 

You think a door closing is going to stop a dreamer!

Where am I going?

For the last few years I have hummed and hawed over what direction to take my life in. I had been so certain when I was younger what I wanted to be until one day I was at a loss. Suddenly any and all ambition I had was gone and I was left to muddle through. 

At 16 I got my first part time job, a taste of earning my own money and proper responsibility the first year came with a lot of uncertainty, who knew that whilst I pondered over taking a gap year straight after high school peoples main concern would be that I would get to used to earning and working and not want to return to education. I was confused I knew what both were like, I also knew how tiring it could be to juggle education with work and knew that this would not get easier when it came to further education. But this didn’t repel me from the thoughts of continuing with education, it was my safety net incase I choose not to. 

It was in those vital last few months that I changed my mind and applied to college, I picked a course that caught my attention, and suddenly there I was on it. The first few months were not what I thought. But suddenly we were half way through and into the nitty, gritty, the stuff that made it real. Suddenly the year was over and though when at the beginning I had thought I would only do the one year I was certain that I would do both. 

So here I am, in second year of college and though I’m still unsure in what direction my life is going. I am beginning to take more of a lead than I seem to have in the past. Instead of waiting to see what comes my way, I am looking for new opportunities, taking chances on things I never thought I would be doing and I am happy. 

I am happy with how my life is finally shaping out. And even if I fail I can try again, nobody succeeds the first time round. Nobody wakes up to have everything handed to them. Life is a continuous fight. You have to work hard to make it what you want. 

I look forward to sharing pieces of this journey with you. More to come soon. 

Till next time! 

#MusicMonday : Alchemy - Kyler England

This weeks #musicmonday is a new one for me. Alchemy by Kyler England was featured on an episode of Switched at birth and I found myself hooked.

This song is literally perfection... I think I have a new obsession.

Enjoy xoxo 

Welcome to 4am

I think for any of you who has read my blog before, I write in drips and drabs with no kind of clear point. I have a million bits of paper filled with half an idea. I am very easily distracted. But today I'm sharing with you a bit of writing that was inspired by all my unfinished work.  

WELCOME TO 4AM

This is the Writing hour
the unseen moments
the writer alone, pad and pen in hand
mind running wild
hurry to scribble everything down, before it is gone
inspired by the maybes,  the what ifs, the could not's
reflecting on the different roads that could have been

This is the lonely hour
where thoughts
drown you
captivate you
confuse you
exhaust you
unsure of what to do
or if you can do it
becoming an empty shell of who you were
you continue

This is the creative hour
full of ideas unfinished, unseen
other worlds full of people who live only on paper
who’s life’s you  write
as a break from yours
These are the moments before sleep captures you
squiggly lines that remember words scratch along the page
thoughts are lost
the notepad falls out of your hand
as you drift off…

-HR ©2014

I decided I was a feminist and this seemed uncomplicated to me - Emma Watson

Emma Watson has been in the spotlight since she was young, instead of being another child star statistic and ending up on drink and drugs and sprawled all over tabloids, she is using her voice wisely to stand up for what she believes in.






She is a feminist and she is not afraid to admit it and hopefully because the Harry Potter star has the courage to not let this word be seen as bad she will encourage her fans both young and old to take a stand.


Her speech is strong, it addresses what is wrong with inequality between men and women as well as addressing what is wrong with the way we stereotype feminists. This is a speech that you need to watch it, if you didn't define yourself as a feminist before you will no.


We have to break gender inequality we have to see if it weren't for feminist of the past women would not have been allowed to vote or work, and for some parts of the world that is still true. and together women and men can break the gender equalities that entrap us all.

So watch it, share it, become a part of it.

HeForShe

Youtube

the year is nearly over...

It’s like all of a sudden the dark nights have drawn in. You blink and its night time, and that’s it summer is over. We head into autumn then winter once more.

With only a hundred days left in 2014 I was suddenly hit with the feeling that yet another year had come and gone wasted. There had be so much I wanted to do, so much I had planned to do and I feel as though I have done nothing. Which is not true 2014 for me has been filled with many great things which I seem to have the tendency to overlook when looking back. Months have merged together in my mind and it feels as though things that I did in February happened years ago.

I have been to numerous concerts, met my favourite band, indulged in nights out, trips to the cinema, went to the Edinburgh fringe, took a trip to London, made a music vid and that’s to name a few, I have been lucky to have a year filled with so many highs.

With that there have also been lows; this year has challenged me in ways I didn’t think I’d ever have to be challenged. I’ve seen behind peoples masks and struggled to cope with the flawed human underneath. Which sounds shallow, I guess, but when you have had people around you for so long they accumulate a pedestal, one that they don’t deserve. No one should be judged harder just because you have higher expectations for them.

On top year is the most unhappy I have been at work (and I have had the same job since I was sixteen)  and I’m sure one day when I have a million other things that I’m struggling with that I will remember my little cashiers job fondly, I will remember the nights filled with great banter instead of the extended shifts, the can you come in at short notice, the untold shifts but you have to magically appear for and the other many great frustrations that come with a flexi contract. But for now it’s a means to an end, it funds the concerts, nights out and other things that made this year great.

So there are still 100 Days, ones that should be filled with magic and memories. Don’t waste your time once a year is gone that it. There are no re-dos, we will wave in another new year in filled with new promises and fresh hope, and whatever the bad was that happened to us this year can be washed away, left in the past, and we move on taking only the good with us.