Looking back on November, my initial thoughts are not how truly torn apart I felt through the month. How split emotion wise I was. How lost I really felt.
I think of the good nights and good friends, the sing alongs, the shots and the straight whisky.
I’m really thankful for that.
It feels like a small victory and watching the month back truly made me smile.
I turned 21 on June 8th, I was in New York and it was a literal dream come true. Its exactly how I wanted to turn 21, in the city that never sleeps on the top of the Empire State Building. I want to live it all again.
The weird thing about getting older is this weird feeling of nothing changing, but expecting everything to be different. I came back from my holiday to the same job, and fell into the same old routine. I was totally void of energy and motivation.
Life resumes and I was slumped.
I think about how when I was younger I had this naivety about ages, and 21 seemed so old. Like when you were 21 you’d have your shit together. That I would have my own flat and a proper job.
What the fuck is a proper job. I have a job and I earn money. And though its not forever it does for now.
I think the worst thing you can do in your twenties is believe that you should have your shit together. It will destroy you.
Just live and let life take you where you need to be.
Find your energy, fight the negativity that takes you away from the present.
